Shira, I just want to thank you for your writing. In a world where a lot of stuff online feels superficial and trite, self serving or only for the aesthetic, you manage to write about (and make me think about) things that really matter. Adult female friendships are one of the most important relationships and I don’t think we talk about them enough. Thanks for these ideas! ❤️
Perfect timing! I was just going back and forth and back and forth about accepting an invitation for a beginner’s tennis class with some other moms at my daughter’s school. My best friends live so far from me and I need to expand into the life I have here. Thank you for this encouragement! Signing up for the class today. ❤️
I’ve been fortunate to make a whole new group of friends through pickleball! There are over 20 women in our group, and we meet for dinner, movies, concerts, boating and more! We often comment about who in their 50s & 60s makes so many new friends?!? Pickleball is one of the most social activities I’ve ever done, plus it’s a great workout!
It might sound creepy to say this because of course I’ve never met you, but I have been following your work for several years and I’ve often thought that if I still lived in Berkeley that we could actually be IRL friends. Thank you for these tips. I’m also a person who never had problems making friends when I was younger, and even as an adult with young children, it was easy to become friends with my children’s friends’ parents. But now as I’m nearing 50 with my youngest son a freshman in college, I find myself in a living in a new state, where I don’t know very many people and it’s hard to make friends. Also, I’m very much looking forward to your new book!
Thanks for the tips! I just retired from teaching high school on the earlier side to be an entrepreneur. I have missed seeing some of my colleagues at lunch every day (but certainly don’t regret trading teaching teens math for doing staging and decluttering work!). In recent years I’ve joined a few local Meetup and FB women’s social and/or professional networking groups. I’ve connected with some great women and have scheduled coffee dates with a few. I really connected with a couple of them and we both said we should do it again…but then never got something on the calendar. It’s now been almost a year and every so often the awkward middle school girl insecurity has crept in and I think maybe they weren’t as interested in being friends as I was. But they could be thinking the same about me since I haven’t reached out to them either!
I’ve definitely found myself craving some friend time and am in the process of setting a girls weekend with 3 college roommates (they are also all on the East coast within driving distance of each other while I’m in Denver 😩). And I just set up a zoom call with 2 high school besties for tomorrow - the 3 of us haven’t been together since we graduated more than 30 years ago.
So it’s absolutely time for me to reach to those two local women and set up another coffee or lunch date!! Thanks for the advice on other ways to meet new friends!
Thanks so much for sharing - people are so busy and caught up in their own lives, sometimes it just takes being the one to reach out and plan something. Hope you have a very happy reunion with your college buddies and set up another local coffee date with your local connections! x
This post is perfect. I haven't made new friends in decades (I'm 66). Over the years, naturally, my lifestyle has changed, my interests have change, my needs from women friends have changed. This year I took a hard look at my relationships and found some unsatisfying. When I made effort to work through our issues, I hit walls, cement walls with vitriol backlash in three cases. I ended the relationships. While I still have five intimate friendships, two live in town and three live in other states so while communication is daily, in-person activities are relegated to visits a couple times a year. The two in town are married with families and while their families have adopted me (SWEET!) there are limits. All of that to say, I'm willing to open myself to a new in-person relationship. I hadn't thought through how to make it happen. I'm Unitarian so thought perhaps that might be a start. But no, for several reasons I won't address here. Your ideas are enticing. I'll try one or two, more if necessary. Thanks for the list.
Shira, I just want to thank you for your writing. In a world where a lot of stuff online feels superficial and trite, self serving or only for the aesthetic, you manage to write about (and make me think about) things that really matter. Adult female friendships are one of the most important relationships and I don’t think we talk about them enough. Thanks for these ideas! ❤️
Thank you so much for this very kind note!! ❤️
Perfect timing! I was just going back and forth and back and forth about accepting an invitation for a beginner’s tennis class with some other moms at my daughter’s school. My best friends live so far from me and I need to expand into the life I have here. Thank you for this encouragement! Signing up for the class today. ❤️
So glad this gave you a little encouragement! x
I am 100-percent going to see Tiffany's show in NYC: Thank you for the heads-up!
Oh, so glad! Her work is so cool! x
I’ve been fortunate to make a whole new group of friends through pickleball! There are over 20 women in our group, and we meet for dinner, movies, concerts, boating and more! We often comment about who in their 50s & 60s makes so many new friends?!? Pickleball is one of the most social activities I’ve ever done, plus it’s a great workout!
That's incredible - so fun!! x
It might sound creepy to say this because of course I’ve never met you, but I have been following your work for several years and I’ve often thought that if I still lived in Berkeley that we could actually be IRL friends. Thank you for these tips. I’m also a person who never had problems making friends when I was younger, and even as an adult with young children, it was easy to become friends with my children’s friends’ parents. But now as I’m nearing 50 with my youngest son a freshman in college, I find myself in a living in a new state, where I don’t know very many people and it’s hard to make friends. Also, I’m very much looking forward to your new book!
Aww not creepy at all! xoxo
Your articles are always spot on and just what I need. You continue to inspire me and I’m so grateful to have met you.
This makes me SO HAPPY!! xoxo
Such a good read! Thank you 🫶🏻
So glad you enjoyed! x
Great ideas. Just be brave and put yourself out there!
Exactly! Nothing to lose - everything to gain. x
this is so well done!
Thank you so much for reading! x
Thanks for the tips! I just retired from teaching high school on the earlier side to be an entrepreneur. I have missed seeing some of my colleagues at lunch every day (but certainly don’t regret trading teaching teens math for doing staging and decluttering work!). In recent years I’ve joined a few local Meetup and FB women’s social and/or professional networking groups. I’ve connected with some great women and have scheduled coffee dates with a few. I really connected with a couple of them and we both said we should do it again…but then never got something on the calendar. It’s now been almost a year and every so often the awkward middle school girl insecurity has crept in and I think maybe they weren’t as interested in being friends as I was. But they could be thinking the same about me since I haven’t reached out to them either!
I’ve definitely found myself craving some friend time and am in the process of setting a girls weekend with 3 college roommates (they are also all on the East coast within driving distance of each other while I’m in Denver 😩). And I just set up a zoom call with 2 high school besties for tomorrow - the 3 of us haven’t been together since we graduated more than 30 years ago.
So it’s absolutely time for me to reach to those two local women and set up another coffee or lunch date!! Thanks for the advice on other ways to meet new friends!
Thanks so much for sharing - people are so busy and caught up in their own lives, sometimes it just takes being the one to reach out and plan something. Hope you have a very happy reunion with your college buddies and set up another local coffee date with your local connections! x
This post is perfect. I haven't made new friends in decades (I'm 66). Over the years, naturally, my lifestyle has changed, my interests have change, my needs from women friends have changed. This year I took a hard look at my relationships and found some unsatisfying. When I made effort to work through our issues, I hit walls, cement walls with vitriol backlash in three cases. I ended the relationships. While I still have five intimate friendships, two live in town and three live in other states so while communication is daily, in-person activities are relegated to visits a couple times a year. The two in town are married with families and while their families have adopted me (SWEET!) there are limits. All of that to say, I'm willing to open myself to a new in-person relationship. I hadn't thought through how to make it happen. I'm Unitarian so thought perhaps that might be a start. But no, for several reasons I won't address here. Your ideas are enticing. I'll try one or two, more if necessary. Thanks for the list.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience so candidly. I always love reading your very eloquent and thoughtful comments. x