How to Build or Break a New Habit
My experiment with Habit Labs
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Earlier this year I was introduced to Berkeley Habit Lab through my sister-in-law, and I was instantly intrigued by their mission: To help high achievers succeed at mastering habits and practices they’ve failed at achieving in the past.
I figured I had nothing to lose and decided to try their 10-week Habit Kickstarter to help me tackle my complicated (irresponsible?) relationship with sugar. I know that refined sugar is basically terrible when it comes to maintaining good health, and yet my desire to consume it has always been significantly stronger than my desire not to. Have you TRIED Ben and Jerry’s Half-Baked? RIGHT INTO MY VEINS, PLEASE!
I regularly met with founders Aviad and Missa (highly credentialed experts in psychology and behavioral change) over the course of ten weeks to see if we could shift my relationship with sugar. The experience was overwhelmingly positive and successful, so I’m sharing my biggest takeaways plus a little interview with Missa and Aviad, below.
Clarify Your Motivation
During my initial intake call with the team at Berkeley Habit Lab it became clear we (I) had a bit of a problem. When they asked why I wanted to quit sugar I mumbled something about loving sugar so very much. We had a good laugh, but I also realized that there was no way for me to successfully breakup with sugar because (shocker) I DIDN’T ACTUALLY WANT TO. When pressed to define my motivation I clarified that I just wanted to be healthier and increase my longevity. Reducing my sugar intake could be part of that, but so could other things like moving my body and eating more vegetables. Ding ding ding! The goal was not to quit sugar, it was to practice healthier habits.
More Specific, Please
The team at Habit Labs uses the SMART goal model to ensure that their client’s are setting goals that are specific, measureable, attainable, realistic, and timebound. Declaring that I wanted to be healthier was vague and unproductive, so they coached me through a process to determine a very specific protocol that felt good to me for my ten week commitment.
Instead of trying to quit sugar completely (too restrictive! Not sustainable! Sad all the time!), I decided to limit myself to 4x ice cream servings per week max, and to stop eating sweets that made feel feel terrible like candy bars and baked goods. While four servings of ice cream per week may sound excessive, let me assure you that this was a MAJOR improvement for me. I also decided to commit to four Core Power Yoga classes a week which would contribute to my bigger goal of improving my health and longevity.
Plan for Obstacles
Before I began, the Habit Lab team helped me come up with all of the potential obstacles that could stand in my way, and we made a specific plan to solve for each one. For example, when I went on a one week work trip to NYC, they encouraged me to locate a yoga studio near my hotel, and helped me map out my fun treats for the week so I wouldn’t go off the rails. We decided that If I couldn’t fit in four yoga classes I could always take a nice brisk walk for 45-minutes.
Get Yourself a Cheerleader
Here’s the thing - investing in your own success is crucial, but I’ve also found that it is SO much easier to follow through on tasks when other people are actively invested in your success. I got a thoughtful and personal text from my Habit Lab coach every single Sunday for ten weeks. These Sunday check-ins were critical to my success and ensured that I had a solid plan mapped out for the week ahead. Turns out I also love praise, so when I reported that I was nailing my goals, the clapping emojis and confetti helped keep me motivated week after week. I’m doing hard things! Everybody clap for me!
As a successful Habit Lab graduate, I am proud to report that I am still doing yoga four times a week. The teachers know my name. I feel stronger and more flexible. I don’t have to wrestle with myself to get there anymore. My relationship with sugar remains complicated and emotional, but I’ve more or less stuck with my new four-treats per week guideline since working with Berkeley Habit Lab - and plan to continue.
As a person who prides herself on completing tasks, struggling to achieve a goal I set for myself felt challenging and vulnerable. It turned out that having consistent accountability, structure, strategy, and cheerleading was the difference between remaining stuck and being able to successfully master my goals. Now off to celebrate with a pint or two of the good stuff! Kidding, kidding.
Curious? Want to get support to build or break a new habit? Check out the 10-week Habit Kickstarter Program right here.
Q/A with Berkeley Habit Labs
What have you found to be the most successful strategies for building or breaking new habits?
Building a new habit is a two-step process that requires breaking apart the cognitive load of how you're going to do the habit from the actual doing of the habit. For example, if you want to start a new habit of going to the gym, you can set yourself up for success by pre-planning all the details, like when you'll go, what exercises you'll be doing, what clothes you need to pack ahead of time, etc. It's incredible how much of a difference this little bit of planning can make. Having a plan gives you more energy and clarity so that you can show up and effectively execute.
What has surprised you?
The power of human connection. The single biggest factor driving our client's success is the personal relationship they have with us, and knowing that if they don't follow their habit, they have to tell us. It's a potent combination of celebration and guilt. We celebrate with you when you achieve your goals, which helps make them more tangible and matter. And on the other side, you know we are tracking your habit, so there's an inherent guilt aversion that kicks in to help you do your habit even when you don't want to. Basically the power of a real human connection has shockingly powerful results.
What would you say to someone who doesn’t trust they can follow through or has a habit of letting themselves down?
It's easy to get overwhelmed and focus on your missteps instead of focusing on your achievements. We all have the ability to choose the stories we tell ourselves, and at Berkeley Habit Lab, we help redirect the focus by identifying the places where you HAVE succeeded in the past. We can build upon those wins and repurpose what is already working to help you achieve your goals easily.
Ever so often I get on a sugar kick and order two pounds of See's dark chocolates or eat a pint of Haagen-Dazs dulce de leche everyday for a week. Then there's a lull where I satisfy myself with dried fruit. Temporarily I've been forced to give up walking so wish to substitute with yoga. It's proving extremely difficult to make yoga a habit. There's no reason not to do it. I've found a yoga instructor who offers beginner classes, is funny, affordable (I pay monthly and do not attend) and wears fab yoga outfits. So what gives except as you said, Shira. Maybe I don't want to do it. Certainly something to ponder. Thanks for broaching this subject.
I am with you—I have no desire to "quit" sugar, but it's always good to improve healthy habits. I also like what Jody said here about how it's easier to add something healthy than avoid something unhealthy. I think that's a good rule of thumb to keep in mind for all types of habit stacking.
Side note, I really like using ClassPass (no affiliation) to find different yoga studios and other fitness classes while traveling. I've used it in at least 15-20 cities and it's always led me to places I wouldn't have gone to otherwise.